Poofed!
by xf-acEPal.M
Summary: Three unsuspecting friends get 'poofed' into an unrealistic and unfamiliar world - the world with Mafia families and flaming rings. Things become worse as they realise that they had no way of getting home, until an offer was made. "Join the Vongola."
1. Arrival

**Poofed!**

Chapter One

The Beginning of Madness

* * *

"The Trinisette… it needs to be in my possession. World domination, who ever said it was impossible, eh?" Byakuran stuffed 19328564238965 million marshmallows into his mouth.

* * *

It was like any other normal day in the little country of Singapore. The night breeze was blowing and it was relatively quiet…

"WHAT THE HELL IS THIS THING?" Three voices echoed throughout three respective neighbourhoods, possibly waking about a few thousand people from their beauty sleeps.

Now, what could possibly have happened?

"WHAT THE HELL IS THIS THING?" Three people shouted at each other for the second time in twenty-four hours, flashing out an intricately designed ring of their own. One had imprints of a snowflake, the second had a swirl on it, while the third had… well, nothing. They looked like some kind of priceless antique. The three girls were all very confused, and were trying to figure out where these rings came from.

"…Well, let's think through the possibilities. Did your mum buy it for you?"

"No! I got it in my mail along with the Reader's Digest magazine, I'm a subscriber, you know. And since the three of us got the rings with the same design for the borders…"

"For your information, the entire secondary two level subscribed to it, Esabella, and only the three of us got it. I asked some of our classmates just now and they looked at me with an expression that told me I was some kind of freak."

"Oh right."

"Huh?"

"I think—"

"Mrs Shivery is here!" The class lookout shouted to the rest of the class, causing most (illegal) activities to grind to a halt – iTouches were kept, the computer was turned off, food was shoved back under the table as students scattered and hurried back to their seats.

The old, frizzy-haired teacher walked into the classroom and briefly glanced at the three girls, who happened to sit at the first row, and then at the three strange rings that were lying on the table. A thought seemed to flash across her mind, but she covered it up well and regained her composure a few seconds later. The three girls took their rings and shoved them into their pockets.

"Wuell naw, guud mawneeng gaaaauls." Her accent was most horrendous, but the class was already used to it – after hours and hours of ranting with this teacher.

"Good morning Mrs Sheevahrey." Came the bored and mocking tone from the class.

* * *

"Hey, Peiyu and Mindy, that looks like that the 190 bus…" A girl with two black, short ponytails said, with a blank expression worn on her face. Her silver-frame spectacles were propped up neatly on the bridge of her nose.

Well, the last two blocks of lesson just happened to be Mathematics and Chemistry – which had ruthlessly killed their brains, making them forget all about the rings that were kept inside their pockets.

"Yeah, Esabella, that's the 190 bus." A girl with her side fringe brushed to the right, said dreamily. However, wisps of hair were still falling into her eyes as she said so.

"It just left…" Another girl with her side fringe brushed to the right, which would have fallen into her eyes if she didn't have white, half-framed spectacles holding the fringe back in its rightful position, trailed the bus with her eyes as it zoomed past.

A moment of silence passed.

The three of them blinked.

"Wait. Hold on. It's the 190 bus! WHAT ARE WE WAITING FOR?"

"Something…?"

"Huh?" Peiyu asked, her trademark response was well known by her two fellow friends.

"Run, run, run!"

They began to break out into another sprint towards the bus stop that was opposite their school, but in a very inconvenient position.

* * *

"There's no time! I'm going to be late in a few minutes. I'm off to school, bye Mum!" Sawada Tsunayoshi, the respected 10th boss of the Vongola, said as he stuffed a piece of toast into his mouth, grabbing his bag and running out of the house.

"Good morning, Juudaime!" Gokudera Hayato said as he joined his boss shortly after and began their daily routine – waking up late and running to school together.

"Yo, Tsuna, Gokudera." Yamamoto Takeshi smiled his usual easygoing smile.

"Oi you, don't address Juudaime with such an informal tone!" Gokudera scowled at Yamamoto.

Well, this was a usual morning for the three members of Vongola – with the three of them running off to school. So, if they were late already, why didn't they just stroll anyway? Because., there was a saying in Namimori High that went "Better not be tardy or ill-disciplined, lest you face the wrath of Hibari Kyoya." They knew it was true – they had past experience. Yamamoto usually joined Tsuna because he was really not a morning person, but Gokudera was probably purposely being late in order to join his beloved Juudaime.

They managed to run half of the journey to school, with Tsuna, the respected 10th boss of Vongola, tripping over himself for only ten times! It was an achievement.

* * *

After an extremely uneventful bus ride, they finally reached their destination - Plaza Singapura, a mall that was a few bus stops away from their school. They always went there every Friday, to eat and to attend their guitar lessons. It was a form of relaxation as school ended earlier than usual on Friday, which was a good thing, really.

They were walking to their usual restaurant, when out of the blue, Mindy noticed that there was a new shop in the mall and pointed in the direction of it. 'Oof Woof Roof Toof Soof Doof Goof Hoof Loof Zoof Coof Boof Moof Poof!'…

"… Wow. That's a … nice name." Esabella muttered under her breath.

"Oof Woof Roof Toof Soof Doof Goof Hoof Loof Zoof Coof Boof Moof Poof! Oh gosh I managed to read it!" Peiyu shouted, nearly crying tears of joy at her great accomplishment.

"Ah well, there's no harm in going in and taking a look at it, is there? After all, at least it'll give me something to blog about." Mindy completely ignored Peiyu's outburst and shrugged her shoulders. "Anyone has any violent objections to that suggestion?"

"Nope."

"Alright then."

And then they took their brave, courageous first step into the unknown.

Inside the shop, it was slightly dark and even a bit dusty. No one else was there, but the entire shop was filled with shelves, chock-full of an assorted collection of unrelated items, ranging from fake toenails, to Doraemon merchandise, to containers of dipip and potassium iodide and all sorts of other equipment used in the detection of ascorbic acid, to assessment books and bananas.

But as they browsed around, there was one thing that stood out amongst the random rabble of things on sale, one thing caught their eye. It was a shiny, sleek black-coloured Rubik's cube-sized square box, with a big red button that screamed "DO NOT PRESS" in bold letters. It was obviously not effective in its purpose.

Mindy summed up the entire situation in five words.

"What on earth is that?"

"Do you wanna ask that guy in the corner who's… … I think he's … … blowing bubbles." Peiyu said, pointing at a corner of the shop.

"Talk about unprofessional behavior." But they went over and asked the man anyway, who really was blowing bubbles.

"Uhh… Excuse me, but do you know what this is?" they asked politely.

Mr. I-heart-blowing-bubbles turned around (still blowing bubbles), took one look at the object in their hands, then nonchalantly replied, "Well, it's a Poofer!"

"Okay…? So what does it do?"

The man waved his hand dismissively, which was quite an achievement because he was still blowing bubbles. "It poofs you of course! If it didn't poof you, it wouldn't be called a Poofer, would it?" Then he turned away.

"…" An awkward silence seemed to hang in the air.

"Hmm, what do you think we should do, then?" A smirk grew on Esabella's face.

"Huh?"

"Press it, duh."

"Ok then, you said it." And Mindy screwed her eyes shut, held her breath… and pressed the button, wondering what on Earth would actually happen anyway.

A thick cloud of sparkling blue smoke exploded and they were enveloped by it, feeling like they were being flung into space…

* * *

The sparkling blue cloud gradually cleared and the three girls found themselves standing in an unfamiliar place. What the three of them simultaneously realized that they were definitely NOT in Plaza Singapura anymore – it didn't even look like they were in Singapore. Instead, they were standing on a paved road, with landed houses neatly lined up on both sides of it. There were coniferous trees planted along the path — this definitely wasn't Singapore. A cold nip in the air, like a country-wide air-conditioning system, confirmed that. Singapore was blazing hot all year round – not that that was a good thing.

"Eto… Where are we?" Peiyu asked uncertainly, looking around at the unfamiliar surroundings.

"I have no idea." Esabella promptly replied.

"Well, the presence of coniferous trees suggests that we are in a place with a cold temperate climate. So we must be in a country that is above the Tropic of Capricon or below the Tropic of Cancer." Mindy recited her knowledge from Geography.

"…Could you please translate that into English?"

Mindy sighed and rolled her eyes. "What I basically mean is that, we're not in Singapore, but in a country that is colder."

"Oh."

That was the 'profound' last word that was muttered before three human figures that were running at such a high speed it was hard to come to a halt, bumped into the three clueless people standing in the middle of the road.

"Ah shit. Don't you have eyes?" A silver-haired boy scowled, angrily and rudely. "Oh well, it's alright isn't it. Sorry yo." Another black-haired boy smiled and shrugged nonchalantly. There was another brown-haired boy with impossibly big standing-up hair just hid behind the two of them, rubbing his head and looking defeated.

"Sorry," Esabella said and continued, "we've just been uhh…" Esabella and Mindy looked at each other, searching for the right word to say describing the situation they were in.

"Huh?" Peiyu asked… again.

"Well, we were poofed by a Poofer and ended up in this strange place with country-wide aircon and coniferous trees and we came to this huge conclusion that we weren't in Singapore!"

"…Singapore? Is that in China?" The brown-haired boy finally spoke.

The three girls simultaneously facepalmed, subsequently, resisting the huge temptation to whack the boy on his head and cause him to become a bed-ridden invalid for the rest of his life, they replied. "No, it's beside Malaysia. Which is not in China too, if you were going to ask another stupid question."

Tsuna swore he could hear the very, very silent "you dumbass" added behind that sentence by Esabella.

"Who are you?" A baby-sounding voice suddenly appeared out of nowhere.

"Huh?" came the standard response, "Where did that voice come from?"

"Here."

All six of them looked down on the ground and saw a tiny baby-faced thing in a black suit and fedora. It – or he, for that matter, was barely forty centimeters tall.

"… Are we in Lilliput?" Esabella asked quizzically, looking at the thing with an amused expression.

"Oooh, it's an elf from Santa's workshop!" Mindy clapped her hands in glee and exclaimed.

"Huh?" From… well, I think you already know who said it.

"Eh? Reborn! Since when were you here?" Tsuna asked, looking confused again. They were starting to wonder if the boy had any other facial expressions.

All of them facepalmed.

"Anyway, I'm Mindy."

"Esabella." came the curt response.

"Peiyu."

After the introductions were over, Reborn said," Hmmm… Judging from what you have said, I think that… You three have been poofed."

"… We sort of figured that out already."

"And to have gotten here, you must have used a Poofer."

"How did you know about that? Yeah, that's what the bubble-blowing guy told us."

"Bubble-blowing guy?" All four of the guys looked blankly back at them.

"Nevermind about that. But how did you know about the Poofer?"

Reborn smiled mysteriously. "I know more than you think."

The three girls were getting seriously creeped out from these people from an alternate universe.

"But we need it to get back to Singapore right? Which for the very last time, is NOT In China." Glares were directed at Tsuna.

"Yes."

"And… Where is it now…?"

"…"

"SHIT."

* * *

**Chapter one.1**

**Omake – The writing of this chapter**

* * *

- "You are pathetic! Even your sneezes prove it, Peiyu."

- "I'm too tired of writing this fanfiction (after two seconds)… I need a power nap."

* * *

**Authoresses' Note:**

Mindy: Hellooooooooo. (: Well, this is the first chapter of our (soft of) crackfic, trust me, it was much more nonsensical until we decided to write it as a more sane fanfiction that will be actually POSTABLE on -.- Yes, the OCs are ourselves, which is why you'll see things like Singapore and blah, but yeah, it'll be based more on the KHR world from now onwards… ish.

Esabella: All I have to say is that I know my senior is very proud of her brother who features here And I'm very proud of her too :D Ok Mindy wants me to write something more knowledgeable, so… cracking is a process whereby large-molecule alkanes are reduced to smaller-molecule alkanes and alkenes and can be divided into two categories: Catalytic cracking and Thermo cracking. xP

Peiyu: … The profoundness is killing me. X_x Hahah I was asleep and hogging Esabella's blanket half the time this was written! ^^ Okay fine sorry sorry. Hahah hope you found our story interesting and sane-ish, cause .. idk. … Okay idk what to say anymore. :D

Uhh.. yeah so those were our very knowledgeable comments on this chappie hehe.

And we have nothing against China (we're Chinese ourselves), its just that we cannot stand it when they say that Singapore is in some random place where it is not.

Please remember to read&review because we like reviews and if you don't read you cannot review and if you don't review…. MUAHAHAHAH.


	2. Into the Clam

**A/N**: HIIIIIIIII! We're back from our super long hiatus! :D SCHOOL LIFE IS CRAZY. That explains all. Why we had such a long hiatus. Yeah.

* * *

"Join the Vongola family." Those three words seemed to have the power to change their lives…

If only they knew what "Vongola" was.

"We're the strongest Mafia organization and that's our very unworthy boss standing over there who has yet to show his full potential." Tsuna was shoved to the front as he stumbled and scratched his head sheepishly.

"If you want to find the Poofer and go back to your world, join us. Your unique powers will be beneficial to the family and in return, we will assist you with our full power."

"How can _we_ help you? And more importantly, how can _you_ help us?"

"I know the location of the Poofer. It is certainly unreachable without our help."

"And why is that so?" Esabella asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Reborn, how can you involve strangers into these complicated matters that they have no need to even know about?" Tsuna's blatant refusal to his invitation made everything seem much more suspicious.

_Where on earth could the Poofer be in which it would be so hard to reach?_

"These are not just your average people." Reborn replied, his eyes stern and glinting dangerously.

"We will not reveal any information to you unless you accept this offer."

The trio glanced at each other uncertainly.

"I guess we have no choice anyway…"

The other two nodded in assent.

Mindy sighed in resignation and faced Reborn.

"…We accept."

* * *

"Hey… Do you know where we are now?"

The gravity of their decision had only struck them vaguely. The three girls were in a daze, everything was just too unreal.

"I know you know I know you know I know you know I know you know I know you know I know you know I know you know I know you know that WE DON'T KNOW! HAHA."

This grew into a heated HAHA-debate until Reborn the all-knowing opened his noble mouth.

"We are here."

…Right.

"We are here in the Vongola training facility. Everything has been accounted for, including your accommodation, clothing and meals. You will be shown to your dorm, which will be shared between the three of you. Assemble at the main gathering hall tonight at 7pm… we have something in plan for you."

Esabella bounced up and down, "Will there be Night Surprise?"

"No."

* * *

Mindy, Esabella and Peiyu were led into their dorm.

The blank white walls only served to increase the emptiness of the room. Three bunk beds lied neatly in a row, and aside from the large wooden wardrobe opposite them, the room was completely empty.

"Well… this room looks really interesting." Sarcasm is a virtue.

Esabella briskly walked across the room towards the wardrobe and poked her head in. After a strangely long while, she closed the door and turned back to her friends, saying, "Hey there's a lion in the closet and it says it's from Narnia and its name is Aslan… or something."

Mindy and Peiyu sighed, looked at one another, then looked at Esabella, shook their heads in utter despair and walked away.

While the three girls were digging through their wardrobe and stumbling across random clothes and 'ancient treasures' – Yeah right, I wish.

"Three-legged trousers!" *flings*

"Wedding gowns!" *flings*

"Birthday suits!" *flings*

".. Coca-cola bottle costume!" *flings*

"I'VE GOT LADY GAGA'S MEAT DRESS!" *throws up*

After digging through all the weird and wonderful mysteries and discoveries of the wardrobe, they finally found some normal clothes, (which are up to your imagination how it looks like depending on what your definition of normal is!) realized that it was nearly time to go, and set off.

* * *

The gathering hall was dark. It was creepy. It was eerie. It was.. FREAKY! But they didn't care. Because they have never cared about important things, and never will, until… the grass turns blue.

"WELCOME TO THE VONGOLA FAMILY!" A loud chorus of voices broke the eerie silence.

A shrill scream pierced the air, followed by a loud smash. Over Tsuna's unconscious figure, Esabella was standing victorious holding a frying pan.

"Where did you get it from?"

"Oh, Aslan gave it to me. It's the same one that Rapunzel used!"

A moment of awkward silence ensued.

The gathering hall had colorful streamers hanging from the walls and there was a humongous banner with the word "WELCOME" written in a messy scrawl. A wide circular table lay right smack bang in the middle of the room and had number tags pasted onto the back of the seats.

"Aaanyway, it's a Vongola tradition to welcome newcomers with a Family dinner. And by Family, I mean the whole Vongola. The Varia have also been invited to witness your _glorious entry_." Reborn said dryly.

"We are _so_ terribly honoured." the retort equaled its predecessor in sarcasm.

"To be fair, we have (more or less) randomly allocated seats to all the people present. Please move to your respective seats and enjoy your dinner!"

* * *

Mindy was seated between a particular swordsman with silver hair that seemed long enough to compete with hers, and a black-haired boy with a jacket hanging off his shoulders, and an adorable little bird hovered around him, singing an incomprehensible song.

"Uhm.. hello? I'm Mindy. Yoroshiku ne." Mindy managed to utter apprehensively as she glanced at the two beside her.

"VOIIIIIIIIIIIII. Yo kozo! Squalo's the name." Well, she wondered how she managed to remain with perfect hearing after that bellowing, but he seemed nice enough… Until he grinned and ruffled her hair.

"Don't touch my hair!" Mindy swatted his hand away playfully and laughed.

"Hn." The anonymous black-haired boy finally muttered, casting them a cold glare. Although she smiled back at him warmly, her eyebrow was twitching in irritation to the one-syllable reply.

* * *

The unconscious fail of a boss, aka Tsuna and a blond-haired creepily-smiling boy were plonked on either side of Peiyu.

There was yet another awkward silence.

The only sound that was vibrating through the air was the constant squeaking as Belphegor polished his knives one by one. "Which one should I use later…?" He seemed to be unconsciously thinking aloud, completely lost in his knife-polishing world…

"Nice knives…" Peiyu barely whispered, but Bel whipped his head towards her and replied, "Ushishishi. Arigatou, that's because I'm a prince."

"But princes always come with princesse—" Peiyu blurted out her immediate thoughts before clamping her hand onto her mouth. Oops. Never offend a prince. Lest you face the wrath of a never-ending lecture on the art of princeyness.

She could feel a weird look coming from Belphegor under all that golden fringe… maybe it was because she had many experiences of weird looks from her friends.

* * *

Esabella was flanked by a purple pineapple-shaped-haired boy who had a peculiar smirk on his face and a laughing retard by the name of Yamamoto. She looked uncertainly around.

"Errr… hey." Awkward turtle…

"HAHAHAHAHA. NICE TO MEET YOU. HAHAHHAH. HAHAHAHH. HAHAHA. HAHAHAH—"

"Kufufu. Why, aren't you such a pretty ojou-san?"

The reaction was immediate.

_*SMASH*_

And with one almighty whack from Esabella's frying pan buddy, Mukuro lost all consciousness and accordingly became the second victim of the day to succumb to the frying pan's awesome power.

Now the other guy had stopped laughing and was staring at her. Esabella didn't know exactly what to do next, but she sent him her best death glare just for a good measure.

As expected, it worked.

* * *

"Oh. This is a strange predicament to be in." Mindy mentally face-palmed as she looked at the 12323471920437 tangles that were threatening to ruin her entire life's work of conditioning, shampooing, combing…

"_Mindy! I WHACKED HIM! …YESSSSSSSSS!"_

"_TRASH, GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE."_

_The very coincidentally (and unfortunately) well-placed cries of triumph and irritation respectively caused them to turn their head at such an immense speed that their hair went flying towards each other's… until they tangled together. Into one big mess with contrasting colours._

"How are we going to settle this? We could possibly try to use two gigantic combs and sort out the tangles one by one with our experience in combing through massive amounts of hair, but that would take quite a long time, wouldn't it? WOULDN'T IT?" Mindy was on the verge of hysteria – I mean, it has to do with her hair, HER LONG BEAUTIFUL HAIR! *gasps of shock*

* * *

"…well, maybe it's true I _do_ need a princess." Belphegor theawesomeprince suddenly said, breaking out from his knife-polishing trance.

Peiyu was at a loss for words. Something seemed to hang in the air between them…

* * *

After proclaiming her latest victory to Mindy, Esabella's exultation quickly disappeared when she saw her friend's predicament of tangled hair with the guy next to her. _Ack_.

_Speaking about guys sitting next to her_…

Esabella turned and saw that weird laughing bloke _still_ staring at her. Somehow the faintest inklings of a crazy idea crept into her mind.

Calmly lifting up her plate, Esabella slowly… carefully… SUDDENLY flung it right into his face. Seeing his expression of utter shock and disbelief, she laughed almost-maniacally then jumped onto the table, shouting, "FOOD FIGHT!"

And it was with that ringing battle-cry that the beginning of the end of everything arrived.

* * *

At the end of the very calm and enjoyable food fight, everyone was drenched in tomato sauce with an assortment of pasta, pickles, cheese, takoyaki, cookies and tiger prawns.

Esabella was still laughing blithely in a random corner of the room at the results of what had happened.

After all the mayhem and madness was over, Reborn once again restored order (sort of), and gathered those present for some important announcements.

"Here is the schedule for what you will be doing during your time with us. Rest assured, everything is absolutely essential and important."

…

None of them could even utter a word.

Because the only word that was present in the whole schedule was red and bolded: **TRAINING**

"WHAT?"

* * *

Authoresses' Note

**Mindy**: Hello my dear readers who are actually taking the time to read our nonsensical fanfic :P It's 2AM in the morning right now and I think all of us are going insane and braindead soon, considering that we're singing I GOT A FEELING in robot voices. Oh gosh, we're really losing it. Anyway, onto more serious stuff, I personally think this chapter was very weird and all, but I hope you will continue reading until it gets to the better part later on! (: I promise you it's much better… I think. Okay that's all, please read and review 'coz if you don't read, you can't review, and if you don't review, BILLY WILL GO TO YOUR HOUSE AND EAT YOUR BRAINS. Nah, just kidding.

**Esabella**: Mindy is ranting. Peiyu is playing music on her iTouch. I am doing nothing. You will be reviewing. Because I know you will be. Peiyu, your nose is running! Hurry go and catch it!

**Peiyu**: I WAS SLACKING THROUGH THE WHOLE THING! Well, not really. Idk. :\ Now we're listening to Namimori School Song! :D It's killing Esabella's (overloaded) brain, according to her. Anyway, Aslan was funny**. **And we watched Rapunzel together yay! :D I love Pascal but I love Bel more. :))))) Btw, my nose is still here even though it's running!


End file.
